When I was a kid, I remembered playing pranks on her whenever she’s working:
“Riiiiiing! Riiiiing!”
Me: “hiluu, pwidi makipag-pumpal?!?”
Tesi: “Uhhh.. sigi..”
(Then I’d be laughing my ass off)
Or, I would turn off the lights when she’s cleaning the bathroom:
“Click!”
(I would hide inside the closet)
Tesi: “Sinu naman nagpatay ng ilaw? Nakakahilu! Alan! Buwang ka!”
..And scare the crap out of her:
Me: "Tesssssiiiiiiiiii putooo, pambili ng putooo!! limang pisooo!!!"
Tesi: "Ay bayag, Utis!! Anak ng kabayo!! Ehek!! Buwang ka!"
Plus, she has these three great alibis that she uses until now if she’s late or will be absent for work. For some reason, it always worked for her.
First would be that someone had died:
“Namatay yung kapitbahay namin, nasagasaan ng trin.”
“Namatay yung tiyahin ku.” (She had a lot of dead aunts, believe me.)
Second was, her husband and their son was drunk and killed each other:
“Lasing ang mag-ama, muntikan nang magsaksakan, nadamay nga aku..”
“Itong si Lando, Lasing na naman nung umuwi eh pinigilan ko ang ama, baka buntalin!”
And the third one would be that one of her five (or six I think) kids was in the hospital, suffering from an unknown, incurable disease.
She’d also use these excuses right after getting her salary at the middle and end of the month.
Aling Tessie won’t follow any of my requests anymore. She would pretend that she didn’t hear me whenever I ask her to do something. And, even if she does, she would simply say, “Gawin mo mag-isa mo. Ikaw nakaisip eh!”
-which is fine. Because she is, after all, part of the family.
Hababerdi Tesi, and more berdis to come.
